I was almost convinced that gentle parenting doesn't work until my parenting style switched from using tools to control children to finding tools within my own personal growth and raising of self.. Tools to EMPOWER THEM!!
When I stopped trying to make the ”whining go away” and began truly hearing, feeling, and having compassion for their huge emotions, the whining stopped because they felt heard. (speaking of situations, not in totality)
When I went from getting frustrated and yelling or using my authority, to getting frustrated and SHOWING them what it looks like to get control of big emotions, they became equipped with tools to regulate themselves.
Children mimic everything they see. Have you ever imagined the shift if you showed them through your actions the behaviors you wanted to see?
Have you ever imagined that they don't know how to do certain things not because you didn't TELL them but because you aren't actively BEING an example of what it looks like?
Children are asking us “why” because they are storing an arsennal of information every second to assist them in making sense of this world. Allow the why to lead to how & express the how in your actions, not your lectures.
My suns and i are still learning to navigate this space. We are still developing tools, TOGETHER, to assist us in hearing, understanding, and navigating our emotions and in turn, learning to hold space for one another’s.
Is the whining gone? Not yet! But I’m hearing them present the tools to one another that they will learn to master as they age and I’m proud! Because at 27 years old, I’m learning with them! Some POWERFUL 5 and 1 year olds indeed!! 🥲🥰
